Who will punish the homeless? Who will sternly tell them to "get a job" so that they may feel didactic shame and use it to begin an exciting career? Who will point out how bad they smell so that they will stop ruining our fried chicken sandwiches that we earned with our important careers? Mayor de Blasio won't do it, because he is stupid and weak. Thank God we still have The New York Post to belittle and dehumanize the most vulnerable members of society. Tough love! O'Doyle rules!

Instead of spitting hot, righteous phlegm in the faces of the four (4) Post reporters who worked on "Bums think de Blasio is the best mayor ever," the two (2) homeless men interviewed for the story displayed more magnanimity and dignity than anyone else in the iced coffee line this morning. It's almost as if they're people!

“I want to thank de Blasio for taking it easy on us. It’s easier for me to get by. Because of him, nobody bothers me,” said Phil Zasel, 63, who was hanging out near Bellevue Hospital with several sacks of belongings.

“It’s better out here now. It’s the best time to be homeless. The weather is nice. I feel like I’m in California. So I’d rather be out here until it gets cold.”

“It’s not like 10 or 20 years ago, when I would get harassed by police all the time,” Zasel added. “People just leave me alone, and I get some money sometimes, too.”

In case it wasn't clear how these impoverished men are infringing on your right to America, the Post gets more explicit.

A similar sentiment was expressed by a filthy, toothless vagrant begging for change outside the Metro-North train station at 125th Street in Harlem.

The man, who identified himself as “Brown,” age 50, said he is much happier with de Blasio as mayor.

“Things have improved,” he said. “Cops are nicer. They let us be more.”

Have you called your mom today to tell her that you got paid to publicly humiliate a "filthy, toothless vagrant" to amuse a billionaire?