maud_big.jpgThe Basics
Age and occupation. How long have you lived here, where did you come from, and where do you live now?
I'm a 32-year-old writer, editor and refugee from the practice of law. I moved here four years ago, from Florida, and I live in Greenpoint.

Three For Thee
1. Do you think the South will ever rise again and as New Yorkers, what should we do in preparation for such an event?
You know, I see more rebel flags in Brooklyn than in my grandparents's town on the Mississippi Gulf Coast (not counting the Dixie gas stations).

2. If you were practicing law, what tv/movie lawyer do you think you would most resemble and why?
I've just broken out in hives, thanks. If I had to work for a law firm again, I'd be something like Paul Newman's character from The Verdict, without the redemption at the end. (And of course--hi there, state bar ethics committee--minus the malpractice.)

3. Is this as good an interview as one from The Paris Review?
Well, no, not so far. But then you're not exactly interviewing Grace Paley. (Ed.- That's okay, I'm not exactly Studs Terkel. Wait, I am, but younger and more drunk. Same nose.)

Proust-Krucoff Questionnaire
Please share a personal (and hopefully interesting) NYC taxi story.
A cabbie once yelled at me all the way from the Lower East Side to Lincoln Center, in traffic, for being too polite.

What's the most expensive thing in your wardrobe?
Have you heard of the No-Contact jacket?

Finish one of the four following sentences:
3) "I hate computers for replacing the card catalog in the New York Public Library and I hate the way..."
...the keys are sticky after TMFTML finishes "trying to track down that book [he] wanted."

Where do you summer?
I can tell you're not paying off student loans. "Summering" to me means a cold beer, sunglasses, a grill, and a hot breeze blowing over the factory and into my Brooklyn backyard.

Describe that low, low moment when you thought you just might have to leave NYC for good.
Construction started on the storefront of a building I lived in, and vermin invaded my apartment. They popped up most frequently in the kitchen cabinets and the tiled cigar box my landlords called a "shower stall."

I hadn't thought it was possible to beat Florida's palmetto bugs. They walk on ceilings and dive-bomb your hair, and after my parents' divorce they used to scamper about in my father's filthy toaster oven. (He'd douse the bugs, and the toaster, with Raid, wait thirty seconds, and then put my and my sister's cheese toast in to cook. Sometimes bugs staggered out, weaving from side to side with the poison, while the toast was cooking.)

Anyhow, it turned out I'd underestimated New York City roaches. One spring morning during the renovations, I rode to work with something prickly in my pants and pulled out a living, 2-inch waterbug.

What was your best dining experience in NYC?
Bamonte's in Williamsburg is always a good bet.

Medication: What and how much do you take?
Sorry, the nice doctors who made me sign the paperwork said I'm not allowed to talk about it.

Photo credit: Maximus Clarke. She has a website.